Author Archives: kristipetersenschoonover

Creepy singing avocados… yes, there’s video

Me and Trisha Stew Leonard's

Me and Trisha clowning around at Stew’s. It’s kinda hard not to, especially when you’re with an out-of-towner!

A couple of months ago, I attended Book Fiend Reader’s Fest III up in Manchester, a little less than an hour from my house. My friend and fellow writer Trisha Wooldridge, who lives in Massachusetts, came down for the weekend, as the morning drive from my house was shorter than hers—but also, we LOVE having weekends together and would use any excuse to get one.

When we were planning food for the weekend, I asked, “well, what would you like me to get?”

Her immediate response was, “Can we go to Stew Leonard’s when I get there?”

She hadn’t spent the weekend here in Danbury since 2013, when she and another friend and fellow writer, Nanette, came here for a writer’s retreat (we were all broke and couldn’t afford to rent a place). On that trip, I took them to Stew’s—and Trisha, who wasn’t familiar with it, remembered her experience.

So, for those who’ve never heard of it, what is Stew Leonard’s? Billing itself as The World’s Largest Dairy Store, it’s a wonderland of pretty awesome stuff, but the biggest attraction is probably, honestly, all of its crazy singing animatronics. Most of these displays entertain the little kids, but they’ve been a great balm in Gilead for any adult who’s feeling down. Nothing a little video of singing animatronic chickens can’t cure, right?

Or maybe just these creepy avocado girls.

 

How a reckless driver gave me back my writing mojo

I was in a car accident earlier this week.

It was after work, and I was in the parking lot, getting ready to back out of my space. I checked both ways behind me before pulling out—physically, which means I turned around and actually looked—and then slowly crawled out. I had barely gone a couple of inches when suddenly? WHACK!

I thought for a second perhaps I’d struck the light pole I was parked next to, but then I turned around and saw a black Jeep Cherokee sitting several feet past me—he’d been passing me. Not head on, just driving by in the driving lane.

Shit. Where the hell had he come from? He had to be going pretty fast to just show up out of nowhere, and because he was past me, he either didn’t stop at first or it took him a while to stop his vehicle. All of this pointed, at least in my mind, to unreasonable speed. In addition, it was a straight away. I definitely would’ve seen him coming.

Car Accident View -- 08-09-22

This was what I saw just before I backed out of my space, which is to the right of the photo.

The driver, a kid who would later prove to be in his mid-20s, leapt from his car, phone in hand, screaming “I’m so sorry! Are you hurt! Are you hurt?”

Well, at least he asked the right question.

He had some damage to his driver’s side door. Mine was a different story—it was pretty severe, probably more damage once it got opened up at the shop than could be seen with the naked eye. We agreed to exchange information, but I wanted to call the police. He was very uncomfortable with the idea, but I’m a Gen-X adult who knows better than to not call. I wanted the cop to see us both walking around and breathing, mostly so that this kid couldn’t invent terrible injuries later. He wasn’t acting like a jerk—in fact, he was polite, just totally confused and didn’t know what to do because he said it was his first accident—but his discomfort with getting the police involved signaled he couldn’t be trusted.

He hedged around the parking lot, pacing, calling his mom and his wife. Then, he asked, “Can you call back and find out when they’re going to get here? I have to go to a Mets game tonight.” Read the rest of this entry

NECRONOMICON PROVIDENCE IS COMING: I’ve got a reading! An art show, panels, parties and a ball!

Even as I juggle fifty million projects (an anthology, the 10th anniversary of Bad Apple, 34 Orchard, HWA-CT business, a short story deadline and critiques I owe people)…I’m getting ready for NECRONOMICON PROVIDENCE, in Rhode Island August 18—21, 2022! The main website for the event is here: http://necronomicon-providence.com/welcome/

Necro 2022 Schedule Book

I made my own schedule book so I can choose all the things I want to go to. See all those flags on the right? Yeah, I’m gonna be BUSY!

Here are some of my cast-in-stone plans. Would you like to join me? Some events require a ticket (one-day passes are available HERE: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/necronomicon-providence-2022-tickets-143546536555) but some events are not only open to the public, but free! Please note, according to their website, masks and proof of vaccination will be required for all indoor events. Policies are here: http://necronomicon-providence.com/policies-privacy/

In between whatever I’m doing, I’ll be taking in panels—both pop and academic, readings, at least one performance, a few short films, and hooking up with friends old and new. I’ve got my wish list ready to go, but it’ll be a busy weekend, and it’s very fluid.

Before I get started, Read the rest of this entry

In other news … I haven’t killed my plants yet.

Summer 2022 Flowers

HWA-CT’s 1st Annual Poolside BBQ!

HWA-CT Goody Bags

What’s a party without goody bags?

I love my work as a writer. I do. But I’ve been working non-stop lately, and yesterday was just the break I needed!

We had a total blast at the 1st Annual HWA-CT Poolside BBQ at the house of one of our members! Bert hosted, her husband Will cooked burgers and dogs (and made homemade pretzels, you have not LIVED until you’ve eaten these), we had cake for a couple of birthdays, we had Read the rest of this entry

It’s here! My story “Wish Bones” in DEAD STARS AND STONE ARCHES

Wish Bones Kristi

TODAY IS RELEASE DAY! My western cosmic horror story—first shot at that, too!—“Wish Bones,” is now available in Timber Ghost Press’ Dead Stars and Stone Arches: A Collection of Utah Horror.

In 1873 Utah, Quicken offers to shepherd a woman condemned to hang for the massacre of a Mormon traveling party—but what’s waiting for them in the canyon is more terrifying than any crime she could have possibly committed.

Pick up your copy for Kindle or Print here!

Dead Stars and Stone Arches Cover

“Beware Burning Snow” is now available for free in THE SIRENS CALL eZine!

SIRENS CALL EZINE Issue 58 Cover

I’m thrilled to announce that my short story –“Beware Burning Snow” — is now available to read for FREE over at The Sirens Call eZine Issue #58!

In “Beware Burning Snow”: In 1980, ash people warned ten-year-old Sissy of the imminent eruption of Mount St. Helens. But there’s a natural order to things, and now they’re back. Sissy’s not only driven to keep one eye on the mountain—she’s compelled to keep them from haunting her teenaged daughter, too.

This issue is huge and features stories Read the rest of this entry

So this baby skunk rescue just happened …

Independence Day has a whole new meaning now. Two baby skunks fell into the window well behind our wood pile. Nathan rescued them with a wildlife claw. They appear healthy and unhurt and are out now and running around the yard.  Video below photo.

Babies down in the well:

Babies in the yard:

HAPPY 4th of JULY!

Wishing you an amazing 4th of July — it’ll be the last time we get a three day weekend to mark it until 2025! And, in case you’re wondering … yes, these Oreos really DO pop inside your mouth!


Firework Oreos Limited Edition

Flowers for the 4th …

4th Flowers 1

My husband bought me these gorgeous flowers for the 4th for the back porch, where I write all weekend. I love these. A little tag that came with them said the arrangement was especially created for the July birthstone, the Ruby (It’s not my birthstone. I’m a February baby, so my birthstone is Amethyst).

4th Flowers 2

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