Winners, Week of April 9:

You knoow whaat you neeed to geet yoour girlfrined to the peeak of pelasure? Heere is the asnwer for you! The waay to meen’s happniess liees thorugh his beed! Geet the maap noow! [scary website address] shall return to my duties and obligations on other, better endowed worlds. She had held that scornful smile, subtly goading Baythan to protest

All those extra vowels! These other, better endowed worlds must beee indeeed amaaziing!

Everybody hates Spam—it fills up your Inbox (unless you’ve got G-mail, which does a great job of putting it in an appropriately-labeled folder), clogs your blog (WordPress does a great job filtering, too), and can threaten your computer’s security.

I have to say though, I love my Spam. It cracks me up—it’s poorly spelled, illiterate, and often leaves me wondering who would be dumb enough to click on the link for whatever product/service/lottery winning from mysterious relative in a country you’ve never heard of. So I decided in 2012 I’d go through my Spam each week and pick my favorites to share with the world. I remove the sender and any links that might be damaging (plus, who wants to give them press?).

See you next week! If you get any great Spam, you can post it here, just strip any links and the sender’s e-mail. And be sure to say something in the post to let me know you’re real. Otherwise I might think you’re…well, Spam.