52 Weeks of Spam: Winners, Week of March 5

Winners, Week of March 5:

Keep your libido high                                                                      

IF YOU WANT TO F–K SOMEBODY,

F–K YOURSELF & SAVE YOUR MONEY!

Some words about health!

It’s motto for losers! Are you loser? To my mind you’re not!

I’ll give some advise how could get it on for a day or two:)

If you can not do it physically, use some ataraxics. For example

Levitra or Viagra…In my sexual practice it helped me not once…

Do you feel such satisfaction by yourself? But i feel it every time i use

such as Cialis or Levitra!

BE THE BEST IN BAD!!! 😉

Visit our site…

Wow! What a catchy, memorable jingle! And I thought I was a loser, but they’re telling me in their minds I’m not…and I, too, can be the best in Bad! Who doesn’t want to be that?

~

Everybody hates Spam—it fills up your Inbox (unless you’ve got G-mail, which does a great job of putting it in an appropriately-labeled folder), clogs your blog (WordPress does a great job filtering, too), and can threaten your computer’s security.

I have to say though, I love my Spam. It cracks me up—it’s poorly spelled, illiterate, and often leaves me wondering who would be dumb enough to click on the link for whatever product/service/lottery winning from mysterious relative in a country you’ve never heard of. So I decided in 2012 I’d go through my Spam each week and pick my favorites to share with the world. I remove the sender and any links that might be damaging (plus, who wants to give them press?).

See you next week! If you get any great Spam, you can post it here, just strip any links and the sender’s e-mail. And be sure to say something in the post to let me know you’re real. Otherwise I might think you’re…well, Spam.

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About kristipetersenschoonover

A ghost story writer who still sleeps with the lights on, Kristi Petersen Schoonover’s fiction has appeared in countless magazines and anthologies. She has received three Norman Mailer Writers Colony Residencies, is a co-editor for Read Short Fiction, and co-hosts the Dark Discussions Podcast. Her work Skeletons in the Swimmin’ Hole is a collection of ghost stories set in Disney Parks; her horror novel, Bad Apple, was nominated for a Pushcart Prize. She’s also a member of the New England Horror Writers Association. More info: www.kristipetersenschoonover.com

Posted on March 10, 2012, in 52 Weeks of Spam and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 10 Comments.

  1. Oh man, this one had me rolling on the floor! Thank you for sharing for this – you’ve given me a new appreciation for spam as a stress reliever and comedic relief. I usually just delete it unread (if it makes through the spam blocks) but now I might give it a little more respect 🙂

  2. That certainly rates high in the sex drug therapy category. What a hoot! I think that phrase has legs:
    IF YOU WANT TO F–K SOMEBODY,

    F–K YOURSELF & SAVE YOUR MONEY!

    Except, the logic is a tiny bit flawed. (Isn’t it DON’T GET F*cked- Save money?) Or is it that I haven’t had enuf caffeine yet? Oh SPAM. Have you know logic? ;o)

  3. Ahem- Freudian slip?

    S/B: Have you NO logic?

    Oy. Waiter. More Caffeine, please.

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  5. I should have included the subject and sender’s name, which are just as good.

    Subject: Stop feeling traumatized over your size,big or small, it’s your choice
    Sender: Men it to you [email address]

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