Monthly Archives: March 2012

52 Weeks of Spam: Winners, Week of March 26

Winners, Week of March 26:

Re: Kaye Petersen

From:   [You guess right! YET ANOTHER AOL ADDRESS!]

Hey Kaye Petersen,

I guess your job is going good. I wanted to alert you to a superb job opp. inDanbury. Kaye we have had few of our clients take this opportunity and I have heard great stories.

The local paper has story featuring one of our clients, Kelly Richards. It will also give you all the important information you need to get started. Kaye the link is [scary link] and I believe the story will be on the homepage until tomorrow.

Truly,

[No Name]

[Signature Line:] Poetry should be common in experience but uncommon in books. – Robert Frost

While this one is similar to last week’s, I just had to give it kudos for opening with a line like “I guess your job is going good” and closing with a quote from Robert Frost.

Everybody hates Spam—it fills up your Inbox (unless you’ve got G-mail, which does a great job of putting it in an appropriately-labeled folder), clogs your blog (WordPress does a great job filtering, too), and can threaten your computer’s security.

I have to say though, I love my Spam. It cracks me up—it’s poorly spelled, illiterate, and often leaves me wondering who would be dumb enough to click on the link for whatever product/service/lottery winning from mysterious relative in a country you’ve never heard of. So I decided in 2012 I’d go through my Spam each week and pick my favorites to share with the world. I remove the sender and any links that might be damaging (plus, who wants to give them press?).

See you next week! If you get any great Spam, you can post it here, just strip any links and the sender’s e-mail. And be sure to say something in the post to let me know you’re real. Otherwise I might think you’re…well, Spam.

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On NYC Schools and ‘loaded words’: Enough, Let’s Just Go Mute

See how calm my cat is? That’s because he doesn’t have to worry about watching his language.

Over ten years ago, my friend Manzino said, “I really think that animals already went through a talking phase and they figured out it doesn’t make any difference. It only adds to confusion. So they decided not to talk anymore. They figured they were better off. So they run around naked with their tongues hanging out all day. But if you look at their faces and into their eyes they have a real Old World look about them, like they’re very wise.”

I thought this was funny. In fact, it inspired my short story “How I Learned to Stop Complaining and Love the Bunny,” about a man in a troubled marriage who essentially figures out his best companion is an inanimate plastic light-up Easter Bunny lawn ornament.

Recently, I read the article “New York city schools want to ban ‘loaded words’ from tests,” by CNN’s Brian Vitagliano. http://religion.blogs.cnn.com/2012/03/28/new-york-city-schools-ban-loaded-words-from-tests/?hpt=hp_c2 The word “dinosaur” is on this year’s list of banned words. Yes, you read correctly: “Dinosaur”; it might be offensive to creationists. Other words on the list include “birthday” because this might offend Jehovah’s Witnesses; “Halloween” because it implies paganism and “divorce” because it could spark emotional damage in children whose parents are in the middle of one.

If that’s not enough, there’s an “avoid” list as well. According to the article: “And not good news for Italians: the Department of Education also advised avoiding references to types of food, such as pepperoni, products they said ‘persons of some religions or cultures may not indulge in.’” Also on the “avoid” list: “Rock ‘n’ Roll,” although in the article it isn’t disclosed whom it might disturb (I bet it’s those damn Sticks ‘n’ Stones).

Seriously? At what point do we stop? At what point will we have only two words we can use without “hurting people?” I thought for awhile, and solved the problem: Perhaps the only word we’ll get around to using is “Yes.” Think about it: “No” could be hurtful to others. If we only had one word to use, it should be “yes.” We can “yes” each other all our lives. We can “yes” each other to death!

Then I realized my “yes” theory really won’t work. After all, to use the word “yes” and convey any emotion would require extensive training, and some inflections may become offensive over time as well.

This is when I remembered Manzino’s comment from all those years ago. It made total sense…one never hears about animals hurting each other’s feelings. I theorized about how it might have happened: After animals stopped talking, perhaps they went to sign language—for a little while, until virtually all of their gestures became offensive; then they had to bag that, too. Eventually, they became mute, and now they only express themselves with their eyes.

I encourage you to read the article and form your own opinion, but I’m with Manzino: Let’s just stop talking now and get it over with.

To purchase “How I Learned to Stop Complaining and Love the Bunny,” visit here:

http://www.anthologybuilder.com/viewstory.php?story_id=593

A plastic Easter decoration similar to the one I had in mind when I wrote “How I Learned to Stop Complaining and Love the Bunny.”

GhoStory Guru: The Nature of the Haunted House

I did not grow up in a haunted house. Well, I did, but it wasn’t haunted in the way most people think—it was haunted by all of its occupants’ sorrow. There was no mistaking the creepy, oppressive feeling the second anyone crossed the threshold. I always felt that the house had a personality, and not a pleasant one.

Recently, while knocking around Baltimore’s Normals book store, I came across a collection of ghost stories I’d never seen or heard of before: Haunted Houses: The Greatest Stories, edited by the familiar Martin H. Greenberg (if you’re a ghost story freak, then you know who this man is and why anything with his name on it is a collection you simply must own). The collection has stories by some big names: Charles L. Grant, Joyce Carol Oates, Charlotte Perkins Gilman,HughB.Cave. This was a tome of classics.

It was likely I would be featuring some of these stories in upcoming GhoStory Guru columns, so I dove right in. Before I could even get started, I was captivated by Greenberg’s Introduction: “Haunted Houses: The American Nightmare.” Greenberg writes:

            “Several films have…[played] on the fear of discovering an unknown evil in the place which is supposedly a sanctuary for your family, and making it perhaps the greatest terror of all.

            “If a house in a story or film is found out to be haunted, the reader’s first reaction may be sympathy for the main characters. After all, they’re just trying to find shelter, to provide a basic human need. It’s not their fault that the dwelling they chose had a sometimes unspeakable history that’s now causing them to suffer.

            “But if you look at the situation from the other side, who is the interloper? Aren’t the people who move in trying to impose their own sense of history on the house, replacing what happened years ago with their memories, their emotions? Some houses may resist this change. Some may resist violently.”

I found this very interesting within the context of the house in which I grew up.

There’s a theory out there that residual hauntings exist because the structure’s materials—like wood, tile, sheetrock, maybe even carpet—“absorb” the energy from a past event and replay it periodically: the “ghost” we’re seeing isn’t intelligent, it’s just a playback, as on a videotape. The same has been said about the materials absorbing the emotions of the people who frequented or lived in it: for example, a home can make a person feel on edge the second he steps inside it if the home’s occupant has exuded nothing but anger for fifty years.

I wasn’t sure I supported this theory until after my childhood home’s renovation was complete: although the pine boards were intact and hadn’t been touched or changed, the sheetrock in nearly every room was brand new, as was paint and carpet. And even though there hadn’t been much change in terms of color scheme and layout, the house felt completely different. It didn’t feel creepy anymore. The oppression was gone.

Out in the driveway, I walked past the dumpster that held the discarded carpet and sheetrock. I had an odd feeling when I passed: I guess you’d call it spooked. I hurried to my car, and on the drive home, I marveled at the house’s new atmosphere and my very strange reaction to the dumpster.

In short, the house was no longer “haunted” because the materials that had retained the sorrow and grief had been removed. And the house seemed to be, well—happier about it.

The new family is, I’m sure, working hard to create its own memories within the house’s walls—making it, as Greenberg pointed out, a “sanctuary”—but what if some tragedy befalls them and the cycle starts all over again? The Haunted House isn’t necessarily about what’s there before we arrive; it’s about what we create while we’re in it—and what we leave behind.

If you’re interested in the Greenberg collection Haunted Houses: The Greatest Stories, you can get it here: http://amzn.com/1567311687

I’ll be at the Spring Craft Fair in Hanover, MA this weekend with the NEHW!

I’ll be at the New England Horror Writers Table at the Spring Craft Fair to Benefit the Hanover1st Congregational Church Food Pantry in Hanover, MA on Saturday, March 31; joining me are writers Stacey Longo, David Price, and Rob Watts. I’ll have copies of Skeletons in the Swimmin’ Hole—Tales from Haunted Disney World, In Poe’s Shadow, Love Notes, and Wake the Witch on hand. The event runs from 10 a.m. – 3 p.m. at17 Silver Street (off Route 139 and Main Street) in Hanover and admission is $1 or free with a donation to the food pantry. If you’re up that way, come on by and say hello!

What chilled YOUR childhood? John Grover might know—Scary Scribes’ March Episode is here!

After reading his stories “3:15” and “The Tie That Binds,” Scary Scribes sits down with Creatures and Crypts writer John Grover and talks Kill Baby Kill, demonic possession, the nature of man as inherently evil (or not?), and scary images from the past—there’s a reason we’ve dubbed him the King of Childhood Chills! Join us and think about what scared YOU the most when you were young. Listen any time or download it for your listen-later pleasure right from this blog here:

Scary Scribes Ep 3 – John Grover, 03-25-2012

You can also listen on BlogTalk here:

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/paranormaleh/2012/03/25/scary-scribes-episode-3

Don’t forget, we’re also on I-Tunes!

SCARY SCRIBES

Tonight, listeners get a double feature: “3:15” and “The Tie that Binds” from the King of Childhood Terrors…John Grover. You’ll be able to catch him LIVE at 6 p.m. ET by clicking here:

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/paranormaleh/2012/03/25/scary-scribes-episode-3

John grew up watching creature double feature with his brother on Saturday afternoons. This fueled his love of monsters, ghosts and the supernatural. He never missed an episode. In his spare time he loves to cook, garden, go to the theater to watch horror movies with his friends, read, talk about food, bake amazing desserts, play with his dog Buffy (yes named after the character in the TV show) and draw–albeit badly.

Some of his favorite TV shows and influences are The Twilight ZoneTales from the DarksideSpace 1999Battlestar GalacticaX-FilesNight GalleryMonstersStar Trek, and much more.

He completed a creative writing course at Boston’s…

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52 Weeks of Spam: Winners, Week of March 19

Winners, Week of March 19:

are you from Danbury?

From:   [Surprise! An AOL address!]

Hello

I live inDanburytoo. Few weeks back I was fired from my job. I needed money so that I can feed my family then I came acorss a news article titled “Local mom fromDanburyreceived $19,716 in grants”. I was in a little questioning when I read it. So I researched about grants & found that these gov. grants are not like loans; they don’t have to be paid back. Gov Grants are paying bills, getting a house, starting your own business, going to school, or even for raising your children.

I asked some of my mates and I found that one of them did received the government grants. Then I thought that I should also give it a try, so I followed the steps given in the news website and also applied for it, and 2 days back I received a check of $11311! Now I can do anything with this money.. In app I mentioned that I need government grants for own edu. Now I am eligible to use it for any purpose you name it and I do not need to pay it back. I guess I will first buy an iPad, MacBook, and few more gadgests 🙂 from it &then, I will use it for the actual purpose. hmm yeah I like such stuff 🙂

The news site where I read the story is [scary link]. I guess the article will be featured on the home-page until tomorrow.

Kind regards

[No Name]

[Check out this Signature Line!]: When a true genius appears in the world you may know him by this sign, that the dunces are all in confederacy against him.

At first, I wasn’t sure if I should admit that I was from Danbury. But then I read further, and I realized that holy crap! A grant isn’t a loan and I don’t have to pay it back! And apparently I can use it to buy whatever I want like an Ipad, even if it’s supposed to be used to feed my starving family! 

Everybody hates Spam—it fills up your Inbox (unless you’ve got G-mail, which does a great job of putting it in an appropriately-labeled folder), clogs your blog (WordPress does a great job filtering, too), and can threaten your computer’s security.

I have to say though, I love my Spam. It cracks me up—it’s poorly spelled, illiterate, and often leaves me wondering who would be dumb enough to click on the link for whatever product/service/lottery winning from mysterious relative in a country you’ve never heard of. So I decided in 2012 I’d go through my Spam each week and pick my favorites to share with the world. I remove the sender and any links that might be damaging (plus, who wants to give them press?).

See you next week! If you get any great Spam, you can post it here, just strip any links and the sender’s e-mail. And be sure to say something in the post to let me know you’re real. Otherwise I might think you’re…well, Spam.

Poe Forevermore: Photos of the Recent Poe Event in Baltimore!

For many years, the Poe House and Museum in Baltimore has held a celebration in honor of the writer’s birthday. In the past, Poe fans flocked to the event, usually held in January for one or two weekends. This year, there was one performance on March 3, and we were lucky enough to once again hit the road for Baltimore and attend.

Although we are still waiting on word as to what will happen with the Poe House, this performance could very well have been the last of its kind—most of you know the city of Baltimore cut the house’s funding in 2010, and according to Jeff Jerome, the reason it has stayed open longer than originally planned is due to private donations and high attendance at fundraising events.

We have been to many of the Poe birthday celebrations over the years and are hoping that the situation in which the house finds itself will change. After the concert, longtime Poe supporter, professor and well-known actor John Astin reminded goers that letters to the city of Baltimore’s Mayor would be helpful. Dust and Corruption’s Vagrarian has excellent advice on the way to write your letter, so although I will provide the address here, please read his excellent post at http://dustandcorruption.blogspot.com/2011/01/where-to-write-your-letters-to-support.html

The address is:

The Honorable Stephanie Rawlings-Blake

Office of the Mayor, City of Baltimore

100 North Holliday Street

Baltimore, MD 21202

If you’d like to make a donation directly to the Poe House, here’s all of that information:

~

If you would like to make a donation to support the Baltimore Edgar Allan Poe House Museum, please send a check or money order to:

Jeff Jerome

Department of Planning

8th Floor

417 East Fayette Street

Baltimore, MD 21202

Make check payable to Director of Finance

Please annotate check “POE HOUSE DONATION”.

~

In the meantime, I’ll share these photos of what I hope isn’t the last Poe Celebration. You can see that this was a rockin’ time, so if things head North and this tradition continues, don’t miss out next year! You can visit their website anytime for updates: http://www.poebicentennial.com/index.html

Charles and Nathan on the corner near our hotel. We usually stay at the Sheraton a few blocks from Westminster Hall, where the concert is held.

Charles and Nathan walk toward our destination as dusk settles on the city.

Every year, the celebration is populated with actors playing some of Poe’s most famous (or infamous) characters. Here, “The Cask of Amontillado”’s Fortunato weaves his way around a pole…

…and at the edge of a sidewalk…

….and in people’s faces.

And here I am with Fortunato, wishing I had some real amontillado!

VIDEO: See Fortunato in action!

The imposing tower of Westminster Hall rises into the early evening.

I have no idea what we were doing here, but I love our expressions. Also, check out the guy in costume—there were several attendees dressed in costume, and I wish I’d brought one of mine because I’d actually considered attending the concert in the gown I’d worn to our Edgar Allan Poe Dinner in 2000.

The back of someone’s hearse parked outside of the Westminster Hall gates.

The hearse obviously is connected with something called Girls and Corpses—this could be the famous magazine, but the logo doesn’t match, so it could be a local band or something similar. A web search didn’t help much in clarifying.

A shot of Poe’s monument. According to the Edgar Allan Poe Society of Baltimore, yes, his bones really are under there: http://www.eapoe.org/balt/poegravd.htm, although this is not the original location of his burial.

A shot of a poster from the 2004 (I think) celebration. We framed it and we have it hanging in our dining room.

The pallid bust of Poe has presided over several celebrations. He’s not always on stage, but he’s always somewhere.

Fortunato and Montresor entertain on the balcony.

Below: Nathan, left, with Weird Maryland’s Matt Lake. We met him for the first time at the Poe event in 2007 and have run into each other at paranormal events on and off in the past few years.

Below: Matt signs a copy of Weird Maryland for a fan while Nathan looks on.

The sale table—always has lots of good Poe-related memorabilia, but my favorite things to buy are the academic studies published as chapbooks (I have quite a massive collection, even though my housemate Charles has me beat. And yes, I actually do read them).

I check out an issue of the newly-established Monsterpalooza while the crowd takes their seats (notice the packed house).

Cellist Gretchen Gettes opens the concert. It was the last shot I was able to get; no photography of any kind during the performance by anyone other than the Poe House’s official photographer was permitted.

Notes from the Second Row

I’m not going to write a big, beautiful review of Poe Forevermore; what follows here are a few things I pulled from the notes I was taking at the concert for the benefit of those who would be interested in its content.

~

“Here, we have the dead in the basement and Poe outside.”

~ Jeff Jerome, Curator of theBaltimorePoeHouseMuseum, on Westminster Hall

~

Cellist Gretchen Gettes opened the evening before Melanie Armstrong, John Spitzer, Mark Redfield, and Tony Tsendeas (well known to Poe Concert goers) took the stage with a clever program that told the story of Poe’s connection to Baltimore through letters and poetry.

~

John Astin opened Act II and presented the loves of Poe’s life through the man’s poetry; he opened with “Alone,” and shared: “Poe was in love with love and in love with so many women; he lamented the death of his mother…he lost his mother…he fell in love with his foster mother Francis Allan when he was in his early teens, he fell in love with the mother of a playmate.”

Reads: “To Helen.”

~

John Astin: “Then he lost his foster mother and there’s a poem I think is appropriate for his lament…he wanted to say goodbye to her, but he was called back from the army too late, and so as he was looking at her in her coffin, I imagine him saying [reads “A Dream Within a Dream.”]…Then there’s something I think is so brilliant about [Dream]…he states [All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream”] at the end of the first stanza, and then he asks it as a question the end of the second.” (Kristi: The juxtaposition exhibits the very tenuous quality of dreams themselves).

~

Astin presented “For Annie” and lines from “…one of the greatest of Poe stories…‘Ligeia.’ We know that she has been his wife, we know that she is dead, but he can barely remember where they met,” Astin said, citing a key passage which hints at one of the story’s main themes: transmigration of the soul.

~

George Bernard Shaw’s thoughts on Poe, Astin talked about the importance of “Eureka”: “If one can understand Eureka, one can unlock the mystery of all Poe’s work…for those who put faith in dreams as truth…the paper would shrivel and blaze at every touch of the fiery pen.”

~

Astin read “The Conqueror Worm,” “To One in Paradise,” and “Annabel Lee,” “The Raven,” and closed his portion of the program with “El Dorado.”

~

Kristi: Letter with Poe’s description of his life over the period in which Virginia seemed to get better, but then coughed up more blood: “…the end of a year, the vessel broke again, I went through precisely the same scene…each time I felt all the agonies of her death. Nervous, in a very unusual degree [Kristi: refs. or source Tell-Tale Heart’s opening line? Check year.]…I became insane, with long intervals of horrible sanity…I drank, god only knows how often or how much…insanity to the drink, rather than drink to the insanity.” [Kristi: Jackalope Story!! Alcoholism!! YES!! That’s it!! Also thematic Poe connection with trigger theory use!!]

~

Astin: “He wrote and he wrote and he wrote and he never gave up, through all the poverty and all the sorrow.” [Kristi: Tape that on your monitor.]

~

The night closed with parting words from Astin and Jerome as well as the traditional toast.

Knowing that this could be the last event made this emotional for everyone including audience members; there was a strange solemnity afterwards: no one wanted to stay, but no one wanted to go, either. At least for me, there was a sense that once I stepped away I wasn’t coming back. I hope this isn’t the case, and that there are many more celebrations in my future. I’ll always visitBaltimore—I’ll need my annual Annabel Lee Tavern fix, for sure—but something will be missing if the Poe House is gone.

The stone marking the original burial site of Poe. The stone was commissioned and placed too near one of the cemetery walls in 1913; in 1921, it was moved to its current location, which I believe is considered the correct spot.

More information on the stone.

Not a great picture, but this is one of my favorite spots in the cemetery—there’s a tiny path that winds past that little gravestone on the right, past a gnarled tree on the left, and around the corner. I’ve never been back there. I don’t want to ruin the mystery.

This is another favorite spot of mine.

This was me playing with shadows at the intermission. I like to call this my “Woman in Black” photo. Currently, it serves as the cover photo for the Scary Scribes Facebook Page: http://www.facebook.com/scaryscribes

This is beneath Westminster’s front entrance. I love that there are stones underneath another structure.

Melanie Armstrong, the gentleman who played Montresor, Mark Redfield, and John Astin take their bows.

John Astin shares with the audience.

Jeff Jerome gives the audience an update on the future of the Poe House and Museum.

Mark Redfield’s painting of John Astin as Gomez.

John Astin signs Redfield’s work.

Redfield, left, and Astin pose for photos.

Redfield and Astin shake hands.

Below: Nathan and I get a chance to chat with John Astin. He’s one of the most gracious men I’ve ever met.

Below: The goodies I picked up at the souvenir table; Charles is particularly jealous of the book on the Red Death. I think it’s the only one he doesn’t have and there appeared to only be one copy for sale so I grabbed it. He’s not going to let me live this one down, I can tell you!

52 Weeks of Spam: Winners, Week of March 12

Winners, Week of March 12:

Letter From Mr.Hassan Goodluck !!! Send Your: Name:.. Tel:.. Country:..

Your E-Mail Id Was Awarded 750.000.00 Pounds In the British Premier Oil Promo For Claims Send:

From:   “Mr.Hassan Goodluck”<e-mail here>

To:       undisclosed-recipients:;

With great pleasure I Mr.Hassan Goodluck, working with a bank here inNigeriaas a Manager. I am writing you in respect of a foreign customer (an  Oil

consultant/contractor with our National Oil & Liquidified Gas Sector) whom made a US$25M depository for an investment program that has remained dormant for

years now. Hence, I have decided to contact you  due to the urgency of this transaction.

On personal investigation, I discovered that the account holder died on December 2002 in the Ukrainian aircraft crash. I made further investigation and discovered that the customer died without making a WILL on the depository.

It may interest you to know that I am only contacting you as a foreigner because this money cannot be approved to a local Bank account here, but can only be approved to a foreigner with an account since the money is in US Dollars. I have decided as a

matter of urgency upon this discovery now seek your permission to have you stand as next of kin to the fund as No one has ever come forward to claim this fund. It

may also interest you to know that I have secured from the probate an ORDER OF MADAMUS to locate any of deceased beneficiary. In accordance to Nigerian Law,

fund deposited for over a period of Six (6) years without claim will be reverted to the Government treasury, if nobody applies to claim this fund.

I will like you to provide immediately your full Names and Address, Date of Birth, Occupation, Tel & Fax Numbers so that an Attorney will be able to prepare the necessary documents and affidavit which will put you in place as the next of kin. The Attorney will draft and carry  out the notarization of the WILL and also obtain the necessary documents and letter of probate/administration in your favour for the transfer.

At the successful conclusion of this business, your goodself shall be entitled to have 40% that is, USD$10M of the total money while I will have 55% that is USD$13.750M and 5% that is USD$1.250M for communications and other expenses. I am ready to invest a

reasonable percentage of mine into any viable business you suggest as a joint partner. Your percentage will also be a source of upliftment. You have absolutely nothing to LOSE in assisting me instead, you have so much to GAIN. Be rest assured that this transaction would be most profitable for both of us.

Your response is highly imperative as this is a TWO-man business deal transaction as I shall then provide you with more details and relevant documents that will help you understand the transaction. I need your assistance and co-operation to this reality as I have done my Home-work and fine tune the best way to create you as the beneficiary while I would use my connection and money to secure almost all the paperwork for this transaction which will be done by the Attorney and my position as the Branch Manager

guarantees the successful execution of this transaction with you as the beneficiary to this fund.

I will appreciate your early reply for commencement of business. Contact me for acknowledgment by E-mail and whereby you are not interested, please indicate in

your reply so that I can seek for the assistance of someone else.

If this proposal is acceptable by you, I expect that you will not take undue advantage of the trust I Will bestow in you. I await your urgent response.

Thanks with great regards.

Mr.Hassan Goodluck

Dear Mr. Goodluck: I, undisclosed recipient and foreigner, am certainly okay with any moneys owed me by some decades-dead dude I don’t know going into the treasury for the Nigerian Government. Perhaps the government can take some of that money and eliminate the need for those “imagine, for just the cost of a cup of coffee a day” ads.

Everybody hates Spam—it fills up your Inbox (unless you’ve got G-mail, which does a great job of putting it in an appropriately-labeled folder), clogs your blog (WordPress does a great job filtering, too), and can threaten your computer’s security.

I have to say though, I love my Spam. It cracks me up—it’s poorly spelled, illiterate, and often leaves me wondering who would be dumb enough to click on the link for whatever product/service/lottery winning from mysterious relative in a country you’ve never heard of. So I decided in 2012 I’d go through my Spam each week and pick my favorites to share with the world. I remove the sender and any links that might be damaging (plus, who wants to give them press?).

See you next week! If you get any great Spam, you can post it here, just strip any links and the sender’s e-mail. And be sure to say something in the post to let me know you’re real. Otherwise I might think you’re…well, Spam.


52 Weeks of Spam: Winners, Week of March 5

Winners, Week of March 5:

Keep your libido high                                                                      

IF YOU WANT TO F–K SOMEBODY,

F–K YOURSELF & SAVE YOUR MONEY!

Some words about health!

It’s motto for losers! Are you loser? To my mind you’re not!

I’ll give some advise how could get it on for a day or two:)

If you can not do it physically, use some ataraxics. For example

Levitra or Viagra…In my sexual practice it helped me not once…

Do you feel such satisfaction by yourself? But i feel it every time i use

such as Cialis or Levitra!

BE THE BEST IN BAD!!! 😉

Visit our site…

Wow! What a catchy, memorable jingle! And I thought I was a loser, but they’re telling me in their minds I’m not…and I, too, can be the best in Bad! Who doesn’t want to be that?

~

Everybody hates Spam—it fills up your Inbox (unless you’ve got G-mail, which does a great job of putting it in an appropriately-labeled folder), clogs your blog (WordPress does a great job filtering, too), and can threaten your computer’s security.

I have to say though, I love my Spam. It cracks me up—it’s poorly spelled, illiterate, and often leaves me wondering who would be dumb enough to click on the link for whatever product/service/lottery winning from mysterious relative in a country you’ve never heard of. So I decided in 2012 I’d go through my Spam each week and pick my favorites to share with the world. I remove the sender and any links that might be damaging (plus, who wants to give them press?).

See you next week! If you get any great Spam, you can post it here, just strip any links and the sender’s e-mail. And be sure to say something in the post to let me know you’re real. Otherwise I might think you’re…well, Spam.

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